A little honey
Before we lived in our house, Nathan and I rented a duplex in a nearby town. The unit was right on a busy street that served as the parade route every July 4th. The last time we attended the parade, a city official was handing out boxes of Crunch and Munch to the crowd. Nathan and I were waving our hands at him hoping to get his attention. He looked at us and said, "I'm passing these out to families," and breezed right on by.
I looked at Nathan and said, "Can you believe that guy? If I were him I'd be looking for voters."
Whenever I look back at this incident, I'm still a little offended that Mr. Crunch and Munch had the gall to tell me I was not part of a family. Did I have to have a child in my arms and one clinging to my leg in order for him to think I was worthy of his snacks? What about my dog? Didn't she count as part of my family? She certainly thought so and would have enjoyed sharing the Crunch and Munch with us.
The word "family" somehow implies a plural number more than two. A man and a woman living together aren't really a family but a couple. Even a cute dog and some annoying cats added into the mix still doesn't count as family. You have to have that child to make a family, right? I don't think so.
Having a child is like adding honey to your tea; you're taking something good and making it sweeter. The honey doesn't make the tea if the tea already tastes wonderful. So in other words, Nathan and I were good as is. Our relationship was solid and we loved each other's company. We laughed at each other, rolled our eyes at each other's occasional stupidity and were best friends. We could have gone on like that forever, but somewhere along the line we decided we were ready for that honey.
We've had a long time to get to know each other, and for that I am so grateful. Last night I asked Nathan one of those questions that only a woman would ever think of asking.
"Do you ever wonder what our lives would have been like if we'd had this child ten years ago?"
Of course he hadn't, but my own question started me thinking. Ten years ago we were so new. We had just moved in together and had gotten engaged. We may have thought we knew what we were doing, but in reality we were stupid as only two people in their early to mid '20s can be. We had crappy jobs and made little money. I had quit school yet again and couldn't figure out what to do with my life. I remembered some of the fights we had, the horrible things we'd said without thinking and tried to fathom a child in the middle of all of it.
"I don't think we would have made it," I said.
It was frightening to think that a child could have destroyed us just as easily as it is making us closer now. Had we not had those ten years to just be together, we may have never become each other's family.
"I guess things happen the way they do far a reason," I said.
"I guess so," he replied.
I looked at Nathan and said, "Can you believe that guy? If I were him I'd be looking for voters."
Whenever I look back at this incident, I'm still a little offended that Mr. Crunch and Munch had the gall to tell me I was not part of a family. Did I have to have a child in my arms and one clinging to my leg in order for him to think I was worthy of his snacks? What about my dog? Didn't she count as part of my family? She certainly thought so and would have enjoyed sharing the Crunch and Munch with us.
The word "family" somehow implies a plural number more than two. A man and a woman living together aren't really a family but a couple. Even a cute dog and some annoying cats added into the mix still doesn't count as family. You have to have that child to make a family, right? I don't think so.
Having a child is like adding honey to your tea; you're taking something good and making it sweeter. The honey doesn't make the tea if the tea already tastes wonderful. So in other words, Nathan and I were good as is. Our relationship was solid and we loved each other's company. We laughed at each other, rolled our eyes at each other's occasional stupidity and were best friends. We could have gone on like that forever, but somewhere along the line we decided we were ready for that honey.
We've had a long time to get to know each other, and for that I am so grateful. Last night I asked Nathan one of those questions that only a woman would ever think of asking.
"Do you ever wonder what our lives would have been like if we'd had this child ten years ago?"
Of course he hadn't, but my own question started me thinking. Ten years ago we were so new. We had just moved in together and had gotten engaged. We may have thought we knew what we were doing, but in reality we were stupid as only two people in their early to mid '20s can be. We had crappy jobs and made little money. I had quit school yet again and couldn't figure out what to do with my life. I remembered some of the fights we had, the horrible things we'd said without thinking and tried to fathom a child in the middle of all of it.
"I don't think we would have made it," I said.
It was frightening to think that a child could have destroyed us just as easily as it is making us closer now. Had we not had those ten years to just be together, we may have never become each other's family.
"I guess things happen the way they do far a reason," I said.
"I guess so," he replied.
